Authorian Adventures in the Ether

Our Griffin’s Story

Just under 3 years ago while traveling at 70mph across the California desert, word came to us that our sixth grandchild would be born 3 months permature.  His mother chose to name him Griffin after the half-lion half-eagle creature of “divine power”.  With a tiny 1.5 pound body that fit in the palm of your hand, Griffin amazed everyone with his ability to survive the trauma of two surgeries that would have ended the life of a mere mortal.  And while,  his body and mind were now denied any semblance of normalcy,  nature allowed him to keep the heart of lion and the free spirit of the eagle. 

Griffins are also known as guardians of treasure.  And while we now, sadly, prepare for him to leave his mortal confinement, we can take great comfort in discovering what his legendary life force will still accomplish.

iThink therefore iPad?

There was a WHOLE LOT of anticipatory hype surrounding Apple’s new iPad and though Steve did his Jobs last week, once again, it appeared to be nothing more than a really big iPhone.  That is, of course, if you are not trying to sell Kindles or Sony ebook readers.  To me, it appears, Apple is trying to do for the eBook what it did with digital music.  However, this theory assumes that there are billions of consumers out there who are just waiting for the right device to present them with thousands of pages of digitized text.  While I’m not so sure this is the case, we must face the fact that our Reading Material MUST evolve.

A few weeks ago I gave a presentation on Digital Media to some very attentive Junior High students.  I coined the term ISARS  (Information Storage And Retrieval System).  The Book and other paper based media represent STATIC ISARS.  Their information does not change, they don’t require an energy source(other than light) and they pretty much last for multiple lifetimes, if properly preserved.  The iPad, Kindle, Laptop and Desktop Computer are DYNAMIC ISARS.  Their information can change in a subsecond, they require varying amounts of energy and they pretty much last until they are replaced by next year’s technology.

I just built a website for my 40 year High School reunion.  The primary record of our graduation in 1970 is recorded in our Yearbook…A Static ISARS.  Using a scanner I digitized many critical pages from this document and was able to build an online directory of all our grads with an accompanying picture.  It is fully searchable and updateable as current information is retrieved and stored in the internet “cloud”.   Clearly, this is a vastly superior, greener way to share information.   However, without someone to oversee the presentation of this information for even the next 10 years, it will not be around for our 50th reunion.  So, as much as we all want to save trees, we MUST print at least one Static ISARS to ensure, at least, this year’s updates will be available for those of us lucky enough to make to to the 50th.

As a society, we have made the delivery of information more important than the content delivered.  My iThink device tells me this is wrong, but it’s over 57 years old and  is very selective about what information it retrieves, PROCESSES, and stores.  So what does it know?

Micro Soft Motivation?

Admittedly my Authorian adventures have been on hiatus for these last few months.  So much so,it appeared I was destined to walk a different path.  Then I got a completely unsolicted invite to a book signing that begins at, of all places, the “Microsoft” Store in Scottsdale Fashion Square and concludes at Borders Books.  At first I was going to turn them down, but they were very persistent and enthsuiastic.  SO, I created a 60 second Powperpoint book “trailer”, got my passport updated to allow travel to Scottsdale, and tomorrow(Saturday, 1/23/2010 at 1:00pm, I think) I will be discussing Considering SomeplacElse, while the trailer plays behind me on the big screen in the Microsoft computer theater.

Now this, in and of itself, is not sufficient motivation for me to get back on the Authorian path,  but then, I virtually ran into one of my High School English teachers.  AND she just happened to be the one English teacher that prefered to focus on the joy of creative wordsmithing.   Next I had several author friends, independently, ask me when my next novel was coming out…my 40th High School reunion committee ask me to author a website…my day job is wanting me to author some very compelling software solutions and then write up the training documents to go with them…another junior high wants me to speak about Authoring Software and just plain Authoring… and finally I have at least three videos that I NEED to make.

So it just could be that my Authorian Adventures were temporarily replaced by a vision(or maybe vegin) quest.
For now, it appears, I am back on track, walking softly but carrying my big shtick.

New Year, Re:Solutions

I like to invoke Socrates at the beginning of all my presentations, regardless of content.  With my younger audeinces, very few even know of him, and with most of my audiences, initially, the Socratic Method flies right over their heads.
But I do it anyway because I want my audiences to make me to define my terms until they understand.

Dilemma essentially means two solutions, both can be right and both can be wrong.  Socrates defined it by describing how Plato came to him and asked to learn the law.  Socrates offered to teach him the law for 1000 pieces of silver,
but Plato(being a Philsopher) had no money.  So Socrates invented the student loan and told Plato he only had to pay it back if he won his first case.  After several months Plato decided that the law wasn’t for him and announced that he was leaving.  Socrates asked him to pay up and when he couldn’t Socrates took him to court.
The court ruled in Plato’s favor and said he did not have to pay.  Socrates was delighted, Plato had won his first case.

Last week, I was offered an opportunity to do a book signing and presentation in Scottsdale, AZ.  I was also contacted by some Hollywood types looking for some scripts.  My grandkids asked me when the next Rocky the Polar Bear episode would be published.  My day job is expecting a demonstration of the sophisticated application I have been working on.  I have been building a personal effort tracking system that is not quite done.  And I want to get back to weekly postings on my blog. All of these things require my attention and  all of these things are worthwhile activities   I call this the Multilemma.

Since all answers are right and all answers are wrong, it becomes very easy to rationalize doing nothing. 
To break free from this motivational paralysis, I have re-discovered the wisdom of incremental action.
If you just can’t decide what you are supposed to do this year, start with what feels right today.

Tis the Reason

You know this monthly episode thing is just not working out.  While it’s true, it has given me the time to author thousands of digital objects for my day job. Those objects will only be read by computers, and they never write back unless there is an error.  Additionally, I have discovered and resolved countless problems in coding my software, but there is really no one around that understands the wicked cleverosity of my solutions.  So I am coming back to my BLOG, where there are, at least, a few humans who will, at least, read what I write.

Top 5 Holiday questions posed to the Authorian Adventurer:

5. “Should I get an ereader(Kindle,etc) for my…”  IF the recipient of this gift is profoundly gadgetized and money is no object…NO…$300 will get you a “netBook” computer that can display ebooks and allow users to watch the movie version as well as send emails to their friends telling them how great the book/movie was or wasn’t.

4. “What do I get the person who wants peace on earth?”  Anything by, about, or associated with Buckminster Fuller.  BF was the first true EBF and unfortunately it is taking FOREVER for the rest of society to get as truly friendly with Mother Earth as Bucky was 50 years ago!

3. “Should I get twitter-pated?”  Text Paging was dead 10 years ago wasn’t it?  The ability to send or receive 130 character phrases about the cheese sandwich Ashton Kutcher just ate should be of no interest to ANYONE.

2. “What is the next big thing in digital publishing?”  I know what it should be,  eStimulation of the Brain.  The idea that we would start communicating meaningful, substantive words, thoughts and images that will bring about peace on earth and good will toward ALL.

1. “When will we see the sequel to Considering SomeplacElse?”  Well, the title was actually  “B.L. Lindstrom’s Considering SomeplacElse”, so as soon as item 2 catches on, I’m sure there will be a lot of people Considering Someplace Else and writing about it.  Of course asked about the status of  Considering SomeplacElse: the movie…

ENJOY!

FUNny, how this works!

I have long been an advocate of design that makes the right thing the easiest thing to do.

This has served me well in most every circumstance, especially those where I have had to build something that is to be used by others.

Today I got an email generated by a recently, mostly digitally, re-vitalized friendship that caused me to start contemplating the expansion of my primary design directive.

Check this out and then come back Piano Stairs

From the Bagger Vance voice over “…God is happiest when his children are at play” to Zippy the Pinhead’s infamous “Are we having fun yet?” it has become increasingly apparent to me that FUN needs to play a larger role in my increasingly logical and frequently frustrating work life.  Now, I know the Beach Boys warned us of the dangers inherent in having having nothing but Fun, Fun, Fun…and I know the novelty of Piano Stairs will eventually wear off…but to paraphrase Dr Praetorius “(Fun)… properly injected into a patient is as effective in maintaining life as Adrenaline, and a belief in miracles has been the difference between living and dying as often as any surgeon’s scalpel.”

So, in this the 100th episode of my Authorian Adventures I hereby offer an innoculation of fun. Enjoy it.  Share it.  Live with it!

And a special thanks to Dave Orner, for sharing this much needed vaccine with me.

Someware, my love?

My favorite Bucky Fuller quote is “when you are doing what Nature intended for you to do, Nature provides”.  I really want to believe this is true, but I’m just having a hard time believing that Nature wants me to write software.  When I deviate from the authoring of bits and and bytes, Nature does not provide much of anything in the way of positive feedback.  Yet when the digital  objects stream out of my conciousness onto my monitor,  the natural order of things seems to feed on the energy, providing me with near fiscal abundance.

Zombieland and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs have outgrossed Michael Moore’s Capitalism: A Love Story, literally and figuratively.  Is Nature discouraging Michael from making his kind of documentary or is it just Human Nature doing what comes naturally, seeking escape?

I love to write fiction.  It feels very natural.  It is so unlike the unforgiving structured sameness of authoring specific instructions to a machine.  On the other hand, edits and rewrites are equally unforgiving and tedious.  Editors and proof readers are just another form of QA Tester.  BUT when your finished product DELIVERS magic to the end user, there is nothing quite so satisfying.

Whether applying my authoring skills to a novel or skillfully authoring a novel application I am finding that I can love this work that nature intends for me to do and thoroughly enjoy what it provides.

When you say aw-fuhn…

In 1879 Mister Gilbert and Mister Sullivan created this dialog,

General. Stop! I think I see where we are getting confused. When you said “orphan”, did you mean “orphan” – a person who has lost his parents, or “often”, frequently?

King. Ah! I beg pardon – I see what you mean – frequently.

General. Ah! you said “often”, frequently.

King. No, only once.

General. (irritated) Exactly – you said “often”, frequently, only once.

Today I hear of-Ten frequently.
As one who has been ridiculed (only once) for pronouncing the k sound in Tucson, the s in Illinois and the equally silent T in often, I wonder when WaL-king and K-nowing will become acceptable.

This dictionary tells me:
“Often was pronounced with a t-sound until the 17th century, when a pronunciation without thelled Pronunciation T sound came to predominate in the speech of the educated, in both North America and Great Britain, and the earlier pronunciation fell into disfavor.  Today, although it is still sometimes criticized, often with a /t/[t] is now so widely heard from educated speakers that it has become fully standard once again.”

With text speak like SKO and LOL dropping letters all over the place on our cell P-hones , it’s hard for me to believe that we have decided as a society to bring back a letter that has been so properly quiet  for over three centuries.  Besides destroying the brilliant interchange of the Major General and Pirate King, it sets a very dangerous precedent that could very well have future generations puzzling over “W hoo’s on first”.

I oncet axed a guy from Hahvahd about it and he told me if I didn’t like it I should move to Cuber.

This is just no fun…or I should I say not fun…is nothing oftfensize in this language anymore?

Surveying: the Value

The latest digital trend seems to be the act of  “formallly examining of the particulars of something in order to ascertain condition, character, etc.”  What do you think about …?  What are you eating? Are you going to buy something?  How do you feel about …? 

In the past week I have been “selected” to be asked about my chocolate eating habits, my favorite movies, my impressions of government, if a free room would get me on a plane to Vegas,  and whether I think advertisements appearing in the fringes of my TV screen during a program are a good idea.

So now the internet should know that I like to eat pure Milk chocolate while watching commercial-free movies on my Television and dreaming of a a day when I win enough in Vegas to build a utopian environment where everyone will be free to work at whatever it was they were going to do before they were told they had to earn a living.

Of course this collective view of my responses can only be ascertained by having access to all my survey data.  Hersheys will only see that I like Nestles better.  The theatircal Movie producers will understand that I am not in their demographic.  The TV people will see, I think, that very few people enjoy having obnoxious graffiti advertising partially obscuring their view.  Casinos will determine that a free room will likely get me to Vegas but they didn’t ask if it was a suitable substitute for winning.  AND the pollsters will know that I want more than just a choice between Red and Blue.

So why do I bother?  Well, I only particpate when I feel the subject will allow ME to formallly examine the particulars of something I want to think about in order to ascertain and better understand MY condition, character, etc.

Audios Amigos

I heard a lot about Woodstock turning 40 this past week.  Three things in particular stand out:

1. It is very likely that if you are under 30 you have no idea what the big deal is.
2. Those who attended the festival and can still remember it, are generally proud they were there, but would never do it again.
3. The Rock and Roll legends performed on Yasgur’s farm, which is in Bethel, NY  some 1 hour from Woodstock, NY.

I bring all this up, not so much to revisit my hippie days (I was actually about to enter my Junior year in High School and trying to earn some money for college)
but to point out something that seems to be the primary constant in our generation.  Music!

We had no cable or satellite TV,  no video recorders, and no Cell Phones.  We had 4 broadcast TV stations, (3 national, 1 local) and two primary storage media for our music,
LPs and 45s.   AM Radio broadcast our sounds on the monaural “Motor Roller” radio in our dashboard.  If we couldn’t understand the words we would make up our own just so we could sing along.  Then we would argue about what they were really singing, AND what it really meant.  But regardless, a good time was had by all.

As I have written here before, my entire music collection is digitized and loaded into my digital juke box.  If I want to hear Santana, Joe Cocker, The Who, Mountain, or Ten Years After some 40 years after, I just build my playlist and let it rip.  I can hear it perfectly.  I don’t have to smell whatever is emanating from the 1000’s around me.  If I get hungry, I can walk to my refrigerator and still feel the rhythms from my kitchen speakers.  And when nature calls, I have ample sanitary conditions to properly take care of business.

This is not to say that there is no value in the live performance venues and the sense of accomplishment that goes along with having been there and done that!  To the contrary, there is a very special place in my soul for these memories.  It’s just that, in my life, music at just the right volume and just the right moment can trigger a flow of harmony that can only be described as the theme song of my life.

To augment Carlos, “music is everybody’s everything “.  A constant that does not ,necessarily, unify the generations, but it certainly seems to bring us together…even if all we do is stand for Jimi’s rocket’s red glare  or sway and wave to Sha Na Na singing “Goodnight Sweetheart.”